Spongebob Lost His Wallet

The reward is 50 clams.
Rimshot!

Found in Park Slope, Brooklyn

Dear Bike Thief

Most criminals are stupid.
That's why they can't make an honest living
and that's why they get caught.

Found in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn

I'm looking for CASSANDRA

Found on Grand Army Plaza, Brooklyn.

Lily - Part 2

These flyers are still up around the neighborhood and someone (a woman, judging from the handwriting) has written “Serves you right for leaving the dog alone + off leash + unattended” adding insult to larceny.

Lily

Another dognapping in the West Village.

!!! LOST DOG!!!

I don't think that Simon is lost. I think he got sick of being dressed in stupid outfits that his owner thinks are cute and ran away.

Found in Coldwater Canyon by Rob, our west coast correspondent.

LOST DOG!!!!!!

Hell hath no fury like a an illiterate woman scorned.

Found on 4th Avenue.

Lost Prescription Eyeglasses

Found on 4th Avenue below 14th Street. The flyer, not the glasses.

Lost Chihuahua

It's been a few months since the last dognapping in my neighborhood. Someone suggested to me that these stolen dogs are being used for pitbull training. What a way to go. Adios, Chi-Chi.

Found in Soho.

Missing Cat

Whenever you get a cat you have to rename it. It doesn't matter how old the cat is or what the previous owner named him. When our cats were adopted they were Hallow and Weenie, because one is orange and the other is black. They became Arlo and Guthrie.

This cat is named Bob Dylan. Whoever finds him will have to change that. Robert Zimmerman has a nice ring to it.

Lost

I was in Los Angeles for Thanksgiving and found a few flyers while I was there, all for lost and found pets and one human.

L.A. has a large urban coyote population. Maybe one them has a taste for Mexican food.

Missing Cat

Found in the West Village near where all the dogs have gone missing. Maybe the dognappers are branching out into other species.

Tall & Handsome - I'm Sleepless In Seattle!!!

"Hi Mr. Tall & Handsome, remember me?? I'm Gina Newton from Seattle. I design furniture and haven't or couldn't forget your kindness and generosity. You saved me (and my wallet) at the Club Sway in 305 Spring Street. You found it and took it back to the bartender. Thanks honey-hon hon!! I know you live in the Astor Place area. If this is indeed you, please email me and say hello. I know you are VERY tall with dark hair (my fave..)

Found near Astor Place on a Sunday afternoon.

Lost Dog

The canine-snatching crime wave continues in the Washington Square Park/Lower 5th Avenue area.

When the New York Post and the Daily News put this on the front page they can use these headlines:
DOG GONE!
HOT DOGS!
POOCH POACHERS!
TERRIERISM!

Reward $1000 Cash

This is the second lost dog flyer I've found in my neighborhood in a week. I suspect that there's a dognapper loose. All the more reason to boycott Saigon Grill.

Lost Dog

Most lost pet flyers are sad but this one is downright jaunty. The only sign of desperation is that the $1000 reward sticker has been placed over the original amount of $700.

Found:

The saddest of all flyers.

If Shakespeare had written a play called "Lost Kitty", it would surpass all of his other tragedies combined.

"To be, or not to be? That is the question" is like reading a cell phone contract when compared to "I'm a lost kitty! Which way is home?"

Steve!

This time it's a phone number and friend that was lost. If I were Steve, I would miss knowing someone with a moniker as colorful as "Kayak" Rick.

Lost Passport

Losing something in NYC isn't always hopeless. A friend of mine returned a lost wallet that she found on the sidewalk and I myself returned a stolen purse that the thief left on the street.

Years ago, I found a cell phone. I held onto it for a while, waiting for it to ring. It never did so I took it to a party that was held on a pier. I was standing with a group of people, talking and waiting for the inevitable. Sure enough, someone's phone rang and everyone stopped to check if it was theirs. I pulled mine out too. When it wasn't for me, I acted disappointed and petulantly threw the phone into the river. Everyone was aghast.

Please Help

There are two things about this flyer that I like. First is the writing style. The conversational tone reminds me that Matt is regular guy with a problem that could have happened to any of us. Second, I like that Matt has lost his wallet, but found his friend, Abe.

There's probably a short story in this, but I don't write short stories.